Every Story ends Happily

It took me 12 hours to do what Phileas Fogg did in 6 days; see China. On sunday I headed to Shenzen, a city near the border, where it is said to be millions of drug users and bums ready to take your internal organs and sell them to Mongolian shepherds.

Chinese border officials saluted me and greeted me as their liberator but sadly I had to reveal that I was only here to purchase cheap DVDs and get a massage. A slight disappointment there. At least they took a picture of me to put in Facebook (?). I have heard that the French were denied access and the British had to pay four times more than normal people just to get in and see how homeless piss on the streets – and no refunds. It is not stupid to ask but to pay. After seeing that China was actually everything you had read it would be, you were quite disappointed. You should actually start to believe what they say on newspapers. Luckily it is other way around in China. There you can be sure that everything you read will be false or at least suspicious. I should have brought with me a copy of Juoppohullun Päiväkirja to show how freedom and reason are appreciated in Finland. Now these poor bastards have to read only red books which tell how bad people the Japanese are. Of course not at this precise moment but again after the tsunami crisis has eased off. Even chinese cookbooks tell with pictures how the Japanese killed brutally Chinese comrades prevailing peace and communist family values. Traditional Finnish bloodpancaces would be a quarantee hit in China.

I was warned that in China people will call you names and mistreat you for being a foreigner. Well again I proved those accusations wrong. Maybe I can be mistaken as a Chinese, who knows. One thing which caught my eyes was that one man has the privilege to be in all their notes, he must be truly influental, not so pretty but powerful. My associate Manson, expert in foreign affairs, said that some think that this man is a god. Mao Tse Tung. For me he doesn't look like a god. He looks like billion other men in this country, maybe he can shoot fireballs or make himself invisible. Then there wouldn't be any need for a face in the note either.

We went with my associate to have a massage in facility of pleasures. The lovely ladies rubbed me head to toe and I bet it was an experience also for them. You don't get to touch spartan body everyday. My associate said that the masseuse woman was horrified before the massage of a lifetime: ”Oh my God (read Mao), this man is huge and hairy!” There was not even sizes for me when I was buying truckloads of quality shirts earlier that day. Yes but the performance was success. They call Thai massage aggressive and for sure, they got that right. I had to fight for two hours just to stay conscious. Luckily I was well prepared because I had had two light massages and a moment in 70 celsius (In Finnish we call this Swedish Bath) sauna before this crucial battle. But my colossal muscle area also exhausted the woman. Good for her that my generous tip will give her a month off from work.

Lastly we went to eat. In the morning we had already Dim Sum in a five star place where they have served also communist superstars like Deng Xiaoping. Restaurant was situated in 50^th floor and there was a rotary floor. In Finland you will get a very close impression when you get yourself drunk and climb on the Näsinneula Tower. But the food was again excellent consisting of meat like cows stomach. A bite of juicy stomach is a reviving start to a fresh day. In the evening we cherished the fine odysseia with five dishes of seafood. I started to feel inner pride and outer grandeur while eating oysters and crabs. I could get used to this classy life. Well four euros is still a little bit outrageous!

All n All Shenzen treated us with warm and gentle hands. It is nice to see that the Chinese don't even know how to use their own Metro. For us all well that ends well.

Treatise on Human Stupidity

Let it be said one more time, humans are stupid, monkeys dressed in robes. Okay arguments without any proofs.  I will give you evidence using the same language which has distinguished us from our primal ancestors, apes. I also use the same method as politicians use, we call it in the academic circles mixed methods. Every time you mix opinions with facts you are using the mixed method. This piece of information is not stressed only some chosen individuals but against all men born into this world thinking like Dr. Jekyll and acting like Mr. Hyde. 

1. Fashion. Pierre Cavallo, Swatch, Gucci, Louis Vuttoin, Swarovski, Marks & Spencer. People don't even realise how ridiculous they look in their fancy wear. When we think in tandem the poor and the rich they both appear distinctive – in unwanted way. Where the rich try to separate themselves from other classes they tend to achieve the opposite. They become breathing statues of degrading gazes. Next they say that it is all about the status. Well I say that you can get a quality whore also but it is still dubious to pay for your company. Think for example the model industry. Women fashion models nowdays are more likely to produce disgust than appriciation. But why do we still want to look fashionable? Out of stupidity. And then there is the matter of piracy of goods. Less the merrier, and I mean the brand. I think many of the brands are all about the brands, not the products. I could not care less if I have a fake Diesel Bag as long as it is good for it's purpose. Before I came to Hong Kong I bought my last pair of Lacoste shoes. For a real thing they lasted quite long: 3 weeks. With that work quarantee I think the Chinese are doing quite well with their replicas.

2. Businessmen and -women. In relation to previous is the world of business. I saw yesterday how a group of young men were being photographed in their suits in front of a building dedicated to money worshipping. I went by smiling to myself and thinking the life of a business vulture. Life with cars, pools, mistresses, margaritas and morning wake-ups in hotels. And the best benefit which includes in payroll is the good conscience. And then they say that you need a degree to become a businessman: Master of Stupidity. I am lucky not to be a businessman and to be a teacher. As a teacher I can at least teach kids not become involved in business. Actually I have nothing against Business as such. I just feel constant repulsion towards self-sacrifice for something like wealth.   
   
   
3. Food. Hong Kong is a very ideal place for those who feel like trying different sorts of dishes and tastes. I can only speak on my behalf but I must state that a prize is a bad indicator for good food. I see people dining in places where you again have to wear ridiculous clothes just to get in. There they can enjoy a series of portions which cost a lot, smell riche, taste like le ciel, look magnificue but does not fill your l'estomac. Excuse for asking, but what is the purpose of eating. If I want to smell and taste nice things which also look good and are expensive I will go to a quality bordel. And Michelin makes only good tires.
   
   
4. Behaviour. Stupid people are easy to recognise out their behaviour. For example they fear embarrasment and try to avoid it at all costs. At the same time they make fools out of themselves by upkeeping certain living habits which cannot hold daylight. Reading women´s magazines as replacements for scientific articles, or collecting sand in bottles, or watching Grey's Anatomy or or opening bottles with your teeth – that is stupidity.
   
   
5. Elements of stupidity.
   Cameras. Many use cameras to take photos which they use as evidence if someone asks: "Has your life been memorable?" Cameras are for demented people.
   Fear of death. People who fear death are like people who will buy a pair of shoes and are afraid to use them because they might get broken. When death comes it comes. When have you read a neverending story? You can try to delay reading as much as possible but finally you have to close the book, or otherwise leave someday by force without finishing even the prologue. And people in faith, well they have of course an eternal life, so keep on reading your tales of eternia, fellows.
   Lack of critique. News we read and images we see on different media platforms do not represent the truth – at least not always. When somebody says to you, that there will be a nuclear catastrophe you should verify this information before going to buy yourself a tent, a Bible and a packet of jodium. That’s why it is hard to even trust politics anymore. It is game played by spin doctors and poor actors.
   Need to success. Olympics are only for those who are the best. But luckily we all can participate in games which are held even as I’m writing this text: The Games of Life. And in these games there are more winners than just the top three. Unfortunately some people have always a head start and some may never finish. And in these games there are no anti-doping policies or sanctions.   
   Hindsight. First they are promoting democracy, next we see them withdrawing.  Lastly they will say what should have been done. This is the global consciousness and the medium of thinking. In Hong Kong people have forgotten all their problems because there are bigger problems in Japan. But it also shows the way people think. The people of the world need unfortunately major catastrophes in order to put their problems in scale. Still I wonder how is it different to see people in Libya being slaughtered than seeing people die due to tsunami. And still only one out of two are being sympathized and assisted with global consensus. We haven't heard the final hindsight on these issues yet. At least at this point we can say that the other injustice is a result of human stupidity.
   
   
   Till next time.