Dec 30, 2010

Handsome man, that´s me

I arrived in Hong Kong on wednesday around fivish by plane which passed presidential
demands with ease. Now I know who to trust in the future when it comes to airline transportations. NEW ZEALAND AIRLINES.
Huge respect. I had my own tv-screen and at least three Leonardo Dicaprio films for me to pick to my amusement.
Unsuprisingly I had seen them all so a movie in which Annette Bening and Julianne Moore were playing lesbian couple with two children was the choice for the ride of my LIFE.
I also saw a movie with Angelina Jolie but it was all about her lips, nothing else fitted into the 10x6 cm screen. With those lips I bet Brad get´s some fine action at home.

Food was excellent and had variety. Two warm meal options. Doesn´t happen with Finnair. And the other was lamb! Mistake was to serve free wine to customers like me. We don´t drink alcohol as you know.
Us Finns are correct and well behaving people. So I had to pass and order Jallu instead. Pretty flight attendant thought that I was hitting her and gave me only water with icy look. Australians on the other were quite an embarrasment. They drank like Swedes: too little and too slowly.

After 12 hours of total fulfilment of airpleasures it was time to meet my tutors, Sunnie and Natalie. Huge respect. And they thought that taste of finnish chocolate was something memorable. I bet it was.
People here are small but delightfully open and willing to assist. For a finn with perfect sense and skill of english language it is easy to cope and make new acquintancies.
For the people of Hong Kong I have been quite a sight, big and tall with muscles like Hercules. Hopefully they can handle all the hassle around my citizenship. We will find out, eventually.

Today I went to buy some sheets for my bed. I bought accidentally only one duvet cover but it´s okay. I can sleep with my roommate who I call "ghost" because he is never physically present but everytime when I leave the room, someone has visited the flat and left the door open. Ghost is a man. That´s all i know. I think he is also a human, or a Korean.
Yesterday Sunnie and Natalie bought me food from local joint. Octopus and tofu and stuff. Interesting flavour. Shark soup was by the way also an experience. Little bit different fish than salmon. The soup I had to buy from my own pocket.

Weather is poor, only 21 grader plus. One thing I have learned is that here you have to wait. You have to wait in order to get to a cafe, a bus or a toilet. Waiting is something that you have to get used to. Normally I just use my elbows and look ugly.
It has helped to get some benefits.

Hey and I also got my studentcard in which I look like Hannibal Lecter´s missing son. Now I can get to a library where I can practice science. Heureka.

Till next time,

"handsome man" (chinese translation missing)    


Dec 28, 2010

D-Day

D-day. It has begun. 
Good morning, or should I say Good mourning. It´s time of deep grief. Will Finland comprehend the loss of me? Honestly, I don´t know.
Friends and foes, comrades and fellow countrymen,
I have a dream. Or at least I had one. But in Hong Kong I can´t run naked and chase buses, so that´s that. Or actually I can, if I don´t get caught. So yes, I still have a dream.
Today I will start my journey officially. I have 60 litres of space iin my rucksack which is not alot. At least not enough for my money, because I will bring all my savings with me. 75 kilos of gold. Hopefully it is applicable currency there. I had to left behind things like:
1. neighbours dog called Elvis
2. collection of ice-hockey cards (including few rarities of Wayne Gretzky)
3. three used longjohns ( I had them washed just in case)
4. electric kettle (they have different electric current there)
5. chinaware (sadly)
6. typewriter (now I have to write sequels to my famous novels without it)
7. a book of Paavo Lipponen (famous finnish peacemaker)
8. statue of Mannerheim (famous finnish freedom fighter)
Now I know how it feels like to go to war. Of course I´m going on holiday but the feeling is the same: excited and waiting. I have received lot´s of fanmail from all over the world and it has helped me to focus on the right things. Final days are always tricky. I have drinked lot of water and beer to ease the affects of probable jetlag. I have met friends and we have cried together elegantly. Tarja Halonen sent me a letter with a picture of her to put in my wallet. I sent her a tuft of my hair. It was a fare exchange. Obama tried to call me but I was busy ironing my silk underwear.
Sad that I have to travel in economy class. Do they even have seats there or do I have to stand the whole 18 hours? I can´t wait to change the course of history. Finland has appointed me this great mission, with the silent approval of Nato and EU. Today I can be seen in Helsinki-Vantaa airport where I´m set to meet the press. Flight leaves 1710 local time. Ready, steady, GO!
Nipa

Dec 21, 2010

NameDay

Hello friends and supporters!

Hope you all remembered my NameDay. It´s a big day in Finland because Tuomas brings Christmas. Without me there would not be any Christmas, at least a good one, according to finns. So who needs Santa anyway. Bring out Tuomas. Any one will do. But he has to be Tuomas. Not Jukka or Vilhelmi or Paavo.

Okay, one week still ahead in Finland, and then I have to fly to Hong Kong. Luckily there is a huge blizzard in all over Europe, so I can come by bus. If I leave now I can make it within four weeks, just in time for the New Year, according to Chinese calendar. Who needs orientation anyway. And it´s in any case better to come by bus cause I don´t trust other airline companies except Finnair and my ticket is bought from some other casino. With Finnair I can enjoy cold meals and company of finnish bozos who are already totally wasted when boarding. Women over fifty serving three Euro dietcoke and wine with hardly any flavour are all  making my experience more comfy and worth my money. And of course I can pay more when travelling with white-blue wings. It´s all about the image as you know. And the feeling of ordering orange juice or asking for a blanket with your own mother language. Priceless.

I tried to eat with sticks yesterday. It feels like I have been eating with sticks all my life. It is not so difficult to keep one stick in left and the other in right and eat using them both. It is all about concentration and attitude. You can´t hassle or it will be header. At first I thought supporting only hamburgers and other western delicaties but now I´m thinking otherwise. So who needs fork and knife anyway. I still have my Swiss made knife tool (What the hell is Linkkuveitsi in english??)  with me if emergency occurs. If I go to the jungle I will need it in any case.

Yes. But now my morning coffee. I have to get used to the idea that they only drink tea in Asia. So one week left with my caring and black friend. Of course, Pauligs. (sorry, a finnish joke that was)

Nipa

Dec 16, 2010

It´s getting near

I have created myself. This blog is a place where you can follow my journies and read how the world has treated me. Twelve days till departure.

Packing is still in progress. No difficulties there.
Visa. Done.
Toothbrush. Purchased.
Notebook. Lost already.
Money. Stolen.
Clothes. No need to have one. It´s warm in Hong Kong.
Passport. Forged.
Shoes. Yes, I have shoes.
Finnish items. Something from the airport.

I think the people of Hong Kong is expecting me. Red carpet has been planted for my arrival; applaudes and chearing hurrays! Now I know how Jesus must have felt. Or some other longbearded celebrity with a wooden stick. I was already getting tired of these Finnish journalists. Media did not treat me well here. I deserved more. They did not even give me my own TV-show. Hopefully I can achieve something stor (like the Swedes say)  in Hong Kong, like the precidency or Nobel-prize. Or I have to go to Taiwan or to Estonia. There anything is possible.

Hope the Asians have a better understanding for big personalities and those with secret gnosis of the world. I greet you with respect and friendliness. You can call me the Finnish ambassador of peace and love. I know about reindeers and Russia because we are neighbours. Also I know something about trees too. We have many trees in Finland. And lakes. But who wants to talk about lakes anyway.

We will see you soon My Hong Kongian friends. Don´t know how to use the sticks yet. So soup would be fine, thanks.

Tuomas (but You can call me Mr. Finland)