at the Beginning of Semester

Hello Mothers and Fuckers,

I thought that I would had learned Chinese language by the end of the week. Unfortunately it will take a little bit longer. Now I know already like two words so start has been promising. Learned so far:

fan laan = Finland
do ze = thank you

I think I can manage with these two till February. Nobody seems to know what Tuo Mas means in Chinese. This I will find out. I have this gut that it will something like "wisdom of gods" or "adorable flower".
Actually some individuals here thought at first that i am a seilor. Can´t blame them though. I have to tattoo an anchor on my forehead.
 
I have listed few things which will make stay here stressful:

1. I have a Brit living next door. He is a fan of Manchester City. So he can buy almost everything here.
2. Finnish is not an official language of Hong Kong but I´m working on that. I think they will consider its position again within few weeks after I have started negotiations with the local officers.
3. I have get to know people from Holland. They don´t even know that Soul is the capital of Laos.
4. I fear that someone wants to assassinate me cause I draw a caricature of Confucious on my door. The Dutch by the way think that Confucious was the Leader of the Saxons.
5. The death of Michael Jackson is not an acknowlidged fact here. The people here still thinks that Jackson lives in Neverland Ranch and is coming to play in Hong Kong next May. Yeah and next they say that
Hong Kong belongs to China instead of Great Britain. Or that Tokio Hotel is not really from Tokio.      

Tomorrow will start my first semester. I have chosen following courses:

1. How to run a country - basics of dictatorship
2. Dog - faithfull piece of meat
3. Chinese Medicine and Herbalism - Diarrhea and other usefull illnesses as means to better selfknowledge
4. From here to thereafter - Gods from Bruce Lee to Queen Elizabeth II
5. Architecture in Hong Kong - Build your own skyscraper
6. Engaging teetolater exchange students to alcoholism - field course
7. Fartial Arts - techniques of farting (course runned by a local master)

Hopefully I will get a camera soon so you will have the opportunity to enjoy pictures I have taken (alone in my room). Yeah.
Hey I forgot to tell you that I visited the Campus library. There is a huge collection of Harrison Ford and Richard Gere films. I will definetely want to get my share of this cultural heritage.
You can also borrow toys and Chinese tv-programs. They work also well together late in the evening.  

Okay but now to the football pitch. They don´t call me the White Anelka for nothing.

Thomas, Tomas, Toomas, Doom-ass, Doumas, Tuomas - whatever works.